Mommyland Monday- Utterances with Kids Part 1

As moms we SAY and HEAR some crazy things. I’ve been collecting some fantastic examples. I hope you enjoy them, and laugh, as much as I did. I was a little ambitious and collected quite a few, so I decided to split it up over a two weeks.

Amy, my lovely sister, and her nearly four year old son:

Ryley was being a bit bossy.

Amy- “You are not the mommy.”
Ryley- “I know, I’m a boy. That makes me the Dad.”
My sister Elizabeth and I look a lot a like, which confused poor Ryley when Elizabeth visited him a couple months ago.

Ryley – “Hi Debra!!” 
Elizabeth – “I am Elizabeth”
Ryley – “oh, hi Elizabeth”.

A little while later…

Ryley – “Aunt Debra look at this!”
Elizabeth – “I am Aunt Elizabeth”
Ryley – “Oh, Aunt Elizabeth”

later still…

Ryley – “Hey Aunt Debra”
Elizabeth – “My name is Elizabeth”
Ryley – “But your name was Debra the other day”

And now it only seems fair to put one from Amy when she was a little girl:

“I can’t wait to be a mom so I can tell people what to do.”

Justyn from Creative Christian Mama with her almost four year old, Pumpkin (screen name): 

Pumpkin had overheard Justyn telling her mom that she might start taking milk thistle to increase her milk supply. Later that day Justyn’s baby wanted to nurse, and was looking right at the source!

Justyn- “I guess she knows where the milk comes from!”
Pumpkin- “From the Milk Thistle!”
Pumpkin and Justyn were negotiating the best way to eat leftovers. They went back and forth, Justyn said hot and pumpkin said cold. After a bit…

Justyn- “How about warm.”
Pumpkin – “Umm… how about COLD.”

I guess Pumpkin needs to work on her negotiating skills.

img by vierdrie 
That reminds me of this one from Christopher and me just the other day. 

Christopher – “COW!”
Me – “Actually, that is a hippopotamus.”
Christopher – “No…. cow.” 

There are somethings that are truly emergencies… but they might look different if you are four. Tonya with her daughter Ari. 

Tonya told Ari to finish getting buckled in the car. She then went inside to get something she forgot.

Tonya *comes running outside*
Ari “My seat belt is twisted.”

img by mercyGurl

I would like to take a moment to thank all the four-year-olds out there for making our life a little more interesting. Here is one from Randi, and her four year old, Addi.

Addi – “Mama, it feels good to go poopoo, huh?”
Randi – “Well yeah, I guess it does babe.”
Addi – “Uh huh, except when it’s spicy.”

And yet another one from a four year old. This one is a boy though, and it is anonymous.

Little boy *laying on bed and groaning* “Ughhh… I’m having a baby”
Mom “You’re a boy. You can’t have a baby.”
Little boy “Oh yeah. *groan* I’m pretending to have a baby”

And a few from little girl Debra:

 “Dad, I bet George Washington was president when YOU were born.”

“Mom, how old was I when I was born?”

After reading about no-mess microwave fudge.  “Mom, do we have a no-mess microwave?” 

Hannah is the one on the bottom right. Oh and I’m the one in the back center. 

A conversation between my little sister Hannah and our Pastor at the time. I do not know how old she was, but she could “barely see over his desk.” 

Hannah “Pastor Rocky, does the bible really say Jesus was not handsome?”
Pastor Rocky “Yes, it does.”
Hannah “You’re not handsome either. Maybe a little cute.”

My sister Laura when she was four:

We were traveling to Texas to visit some friends. There was a TON of road construction.

“Why are we traveling to Texas when it is unfinished?”

From Sara Shay, author of Your Thriving Family:

Sweetie Pea (screen name) “The drink makes my hurt go away”
After explaining something to her three year old son, Singer (screen name), he asked again “why”.

Sara – “Because I said so.”
Singer – “What does that mean?”

Cassie, author of Gaps of Light, and her three year old son:

Cassie had been trying to get her son to eat his vegetables, something she often assures him will make him grown big and strong.

Kohen – “and I am going to grown up and be a big man, and then when you get sad I will give you a hug and say, ‘It’s alright, mom, don’t be sad.”

Isn’t that just too sweet?

From Kate, author of Modern Alternative Mama:

Daniel (2) – *started putting on his shoes*
Ben (dad) – “Where are you going?”
Daniel – “Hopping down the bunny trail.”
Kate told her daughter to put the cheese away.

Bekah (4) “You see me bein’ busy, right? I’m doing something else right now, so don’t tell me to do that.

 Kate says Bekah might have heard that one before. 

Speaking of hearing that one before… this was from
Christopher when he was about 18 months old:

I had just finished taking a shower, and my clothes where laying all over the bathroom floor. Christopher came in and looked at the clothes with a very serious face. He looked at me with a bit of a I-am-disappointment-in-you look. “Ohh.. uh”

And another humbling one with Christopher:

I was being a bit of a baby, and crying over something silly. 

Christopher “wrong mom?”
Me – “Oh, I just need a hug from you.”
Christopher – “Bop?” 

Since I’m sure you do not speak Christopherease, “Bop” means “bed” or “laying down.” When he is  throwing a fit and crying over silly things… we put him to bed.

What are some crazy things you’ve heard kids say?

Next week part 2… and then “Rules I NEVER Thought I’d Have To Make”

If you have ever had to tell your kids to do things, you never thought you would have to, e-mail me at littledebbienot(at) and tell me about them! Make sure you include your kids ages and their screen or real names, and your blog if you have one. I am also collecting photos of “Kid’s Fashions” and of “Road Blocks” (funny places, or ways, your kids have gotten stuck).


  1. So funny! I posted on Facebook. :-)