She Watches Over the Affairs of Her Household- Week 3

Last week I challenged you to ask a few ladies what homemaking looked like to them, your husband what was important to him, and also to prayerfully consider what you needed. Then to make a Homemaking Mission Statement. I’d love to know what you learned! Tell me in the comments! Here is how I did (not as great as I would have liked…) and what I learned.

On Keeping a Home

Did you see my husband’s responses to what homemaking looks like to him? I thought it was very well written out, and spoke volumes to me. Due to being sick the last two weekends I was not able to meet with the ladies I was hoping to ask about homemaking, but I did ask my Mom, and dwelled on all the advice I had been given over the years. I have a friend I hope to meet with this week about it also.

What I Have Learned

Would you like to know what I keep being told about this season of life? Relationships. Spend time with Mark, and enjoy my young children. They grow up fast! To embrace this season with open arms. As far as keeping a house itself, the best advice I have received  from a dear Wichita friend, was “I used to stress but then I realized if the Queen of England was coming over I could not do more.” Or maybe it was Martha Steward, I forget. I think back to all the advice I have been given, and it is almost all about relationships and not stressing about the house.

Homemaking Mission Statement

In light of that, what do I want as a homemaker?

To maintain a place that facilitates relationships. To not be a manager of stuff, but to embrace simplicity. To not be kept by my home, (either through it being an unusable mess, or stressing about keeping it perfect), but to maintain it in a functional manner. To take pride in my homemaking, realizing the importance of the home, and thus the keeping of it. To keep a fun, functional, and relaxing place for family first, and friends second. I do not want to live in a state of unrest caused by clutter and dirty dishes taking over, but in a place of peace. A safe place, a place of hospitality, with open doors, and couches and tables ready for fellowship.

Did you come up with a mission statement? What things are important to you in homemaking?

Week 3 Challenge: There are four important parts to keeping a home: the will, the goal, the ability, and a plan. Since we have already talked about will and goal we will be spending the next few weeks on ability. I have been very open with you about my struggle with homemaking, at least lately, but I am not sure you know this. I am LEAPS and BOUNDS better then when we got married. What has changed? I have less time now, but I have far more knowledge. The biggest thing I have learned is this- It is hard to be a keeper of a home, if you are pouring your energy into something that is broken. Sort of like trying to fill a hole with sand… when your shovel has a hole in it. Once I began realizing that the answer was to fix my problems instead of continually trying to keep it contained and out of site, my life became a LOT easier.

This week the challenge is to go find 5 specific trouble areas/items which need fixing. Be specific. Do not say “the kitchen” if the kitchen is always a mess because you dirty up too many dishes… say “cups” or “plates.” Then work on one, for 30 minutes, each day this week. We will be doing the same thing next week also. The goal with this is to get the point where simple maintenance is a possibility. Or at least closer.

For example: if you have a bad landing spot- De-clutter, organize, and if possible decorate it. If a landing spot is decorated, it is far less likely to become one.

If keeping up with toys is impossible- Get rid of some and pack others away. Consider doing a toy library as discussed here on Stacy Makes Cents. My rule is if it takes more then 5 minutes to pick up all the kids toys and books we have too many out and/or too many out. As far as the rest of the house, we try to keep within 10 minutes of being picked up.

If you have a trouble spot you need to fix, but am not sure how, ask someone. I’d be willing to give advise, or you could ask a friend. There are SO many ideas out there. My advise is this though, don’t just organize. De-clutter. Always de-clutter before organizing! Less stuff is always easier to manage then extremely organized stuff.

My Trouble Spots
Here are the small trouble spots I will be working on this week.

  1. Toys- I have a toy library, but it needs updating.
  2. Children’s Clothes and Shoes– The kids can drag them out. I need to find a solution.
  3. Turning Cabinet- (my only pantry area)- Natalia gets down there and spills food.
  4. Tupperware– Once again my kids can drag them out, leaving them places, and they are terribly disorganized. 
  5. Our Upstairs Desk- The inside of the desk is too messy, meaning bills get stacked ON TOP of the desk. And sometimes even disappear. Not good. The top of the desk is also a BAD landing spot.
I will be updating on facebook with pictures. 

Challenge Skinny 

Finds five specific trouble areas and spend 30 minutes working on fixing each one. 

Comments

  1. What a homemaker looks like to me, is staying at my station, being the guard over the home as per Titus 2:5. I loved that you too, discovered the importance of relationships and the balance of the home not overshadowing such.

    As for my husband he would prefer the feminist he married, the independent woman who can provide for herself and has no need for the husband to provide, protect, etc. He struggles with the biblical role and he would not read what your husband wrote, even if your husband handed it to him in person. My husband is content with his role and sees no reason to improve upon it.

    I pray this does not sound cold or harsh, for God is the giver of peace, not the world. The peace He gives is beyond understanding. An amiable relationship can be in a marriage and still have huge difference in a worldview. One just chooses wisely the place to stand and the place to give in.

    We are told that the believing spouse is a witness to the unbelieving spouse. However, some women are married to man like Sampson, or Ananias, or even Jacob who loved Rachel and not Leah. God is able to work in trying relationships for the keeper-at-home that does not have the idea environment.

    This will cause these homes to look far different than the home where the family is in order, the husband leading in righteousness. Yet, God is able to bless the spouse set on pleasing Him, no matter the situation.

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